The child did not know why he resisted when he was robbed of his toy

What is the reason why children do not resist when they are robbed of toys? Is it a good thing that kids don't fight when they're robbed of their toys? Faced with this situation, how should parents guide? Several children play together, minutes will be staged to grab the toy of the war - or take a fancy to which children play toys, open rob! Or are you taking my toys? No way! I gotta get it back! Therefore, many mothers are very upset about this, thinking that if the children do not grab the toy, it would be good. But the truth is, if your child doesn't grab the toy, and doesn't even fight back when the toy is robbed, you might be upset, too. Xiao Lin family has a 1 year old more than 4 months of male treasure, she sent a private message to her mother said: "my baby 1 year old more than 4 months, every time he went out to play were robbed of toys by other children, he may still be playing, see other children come directly to take away his toys, he stood there, do not know resistance, also do not cry. Is he a coward to take back the solitary toy when he has had enough?" Similar WITH Xiao Lin, the FRIEND ALSO HAD similar TROUBLE: the friend home blossoming 2 years old, at ordinary times very live in the home. But when I play in the community, it becomes very quiet. For example, when playing on the slide, as long as there are people on it, even a very small baby, he will not go up. Always wait and wait, until completely no one, just go up to play. If another child came, he would come down at once. In the friend's view, this is the small flower is not confident performance. It can be seen that, regarding the matter of "robbing" and "being robbed", whether it is the former or the latter, the master has an endless mind! But then again, is it really cowardly or lacking confidence for a child not to fight back when robbed of a toy? In fact, children do not grab toys, do not resist, there are three main reasons: first, children are naturally gentle temperament some children are naturally gentle personality, but it does not mean that children do not have a temper, but he rarely care about what things or things, this includes toys. If a child wants to play with his toy, he will think that since the other child wants to play, let him play, it doesn't matter. Of course, there may not be many of them. Of course, if the child is naturally gentle, parents don't have to make him "pushy" either, as long as the child feels comfortable. Second, the child's sense of property rights has not formed compared with the child's natural gentle character, the "sense of property rights" has not formed is more likely to be the biggest reason why the child does not resist the toy being robbed. Generally speaking, children will enter a critical period of self-consciousness development after the age of 1 year, when they have a preliminary concept of "me", which is commonly referred to as the "sense of property rights" begins to sprout. Before the consciousness of property rights is formed, the child does not have the concept of "me". At this time, if he is robbed by someone suddenly, he may be stunned there at a loss, because he doesn't know why someone robbed me, or he doesn't know how to deal with it. Plus he is relatively young, so his language skills are not perfect. Moms shouldn't be in a hurry about this, you know. Children's social development is a gradual process. What we as parents can do is also some step by step methods, such as first let children contact and play with their partners, in order to improve their communication experience, because children will pay attention to each other, play with toys and even imitate actions, generally in the two years old or after the age of two. By the time the child is about three years old, there is a cooperative and mutually beneficial behavior, such as exchanging toys or food. If the child does not like to play with other children, parents do not force him, can slowly guide. Secondly, it is to help children establish and improve the "sense of property rights", clear children's "concept of property rights". When giving a child an item, parents should tell the child, "This item belongs to you, you must take care of it yourself" or, "This item is yours, if others want to take it away, they must ask your permission." If a child steals a toy in front of you, what you need to do is not to encourage the child to take the toy back, but to help him establish that the object is his sense of property rights. Yesterday, moving mother with children in the community to play twister car. Perhaps because the car had music, and it was very nice, an older child ran over and wanted to play. My son is less than two years old, language expression ability is not good, behavior action is not enough, plus this period of time had a little illness, so he is very thin. Some of the older children, come over hand to pull the car, I will directly hold the car, and then warm voice to the child said: "children, you wait for a while" and then turned to ask my son: "baby, this car is your, you now play? Want to play with this little brother?" My son thought about it for a moment and went from one-handed handlebars to two-handed handlebars. I told the child: "Sorry, little friend, brother also play for a while, wait for him not to play again to you, OK?" It was obvious that the boy was reluctant, but his mother came and pulled him away. Then whether he was happy or how his mother comforted him was out of my consideration. As a mother, my first priority should be my own son's feelings. Three, parents strict attitude some of their toys were robbed dare not resist, or dare not refuse, may also be the reason for parents. Some parents are better face, think it is a toy, the other side like to play to him first? There is no need to rob, in case of robbing each other's children cry, is to let oneself very lose face. So, once the child has to snatch back the toy, such a parent will scold the child "not sensible". It is because parents are too strict with their children that children dare not resist in the face of toys being robbed. If this is the case, what we as parents need to do is to let our children bravely express their true feelings: if someone takes away a child's toy and the child cries, what parents should do is not to say "you are not allowed to cry" or "why are you so stingy?" Instead, ask the child: "What do you think? Do you not want to give this toy to children?" And if the child's toy has been taken away, we can also ask: "Do you need us to get the toy back together?" Or "What do you want your mother to do", in fact, what the parents need to do is to let the children feel the strength and support from the parents in this way, and then the children will speak out their ideas boldly when they are robbed of the toy. So, if the child is robbed of toys dare not resist, parents do not have to worry too much, do not label the child some "good" "timid". At the same time, we should also be careful not to be too serious and harsh to the child, to let the child dare to express their thoughts or anger.